JOKES

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KING KONG JOKES

What do you get if you cross King Kong with a snowman?
Frostbite. 

Why did King Kong join the army?
To learn about gorilla warfare. 

What do you do if King Kong sits in front of you at the cinema? 
Miss most of the film! 

What happened when King Kong swallowed Big Ben?
He found time-consuming.

 
What's the best way to get King Kong to sit up and beg?
Wave a two-ton banana in front of his nose. 

What do you get if you cross King Kong with a giant frog?
A monster that climbs up the Empire State Building and catches aeroplanes with its tongue. 

What's big and hairy and climbs up the Empire State Building in a dress? 
Queen Kong. 

How can you mend King Kong's arm if he's twisted it?
With a monkey wrench.

 
If King Kong went to Hong Kong to play ping-gong and died, what would they put on his coffin? 
A lid. 

What is as big as King Kong but doesn't weigh anything? 
King Kong's shadow. 

What do you get if you cross King Kong with a watchdog? 
A terrified postman. 

Who is the smelliest, hairiest monarch in the world? 
King Pong.

What's brown and furry on the inside and clear on the outside? 
King Kong in clingfilm 

Why didn't King Kong go to Hong Kong? 
He didn't like Chinese food. 

Why did King Kong paint the bottoms of his feet brown? 
So that he could hide upside down in a jar of peanut butter.

What is big, hairy and can fly faster than sound? 
King Koncord. 

If King Kong came to England why would he live in the Tower of London? 
Because he's a beef-eater.

What do you get if you cross King Kong with a frog? 
A gorilla that catches airplanes with its tongue.

 
What business is King Kong in? 
Monkey business.